What exactly does mean, coming out as trans lover? Before to get there, let me introduce myself.
Hi there, I'm Andrea Del Riva, an Italian man, 39 years old and the author of this blog. If you are Italian, you may have seen my others blogs Italy based. Are all about my stories and romances with transsexual girls, dating experience, and transgender community matter. The purpose of this blog is sharing with you guys my stories and experiences, but what is most dear to my heart, is to help out trans-oriented men like me to do their coming out as trans lover as I did.
Further, as side commitment, I'm also trying to give mine contribute for the benefit of LGBT community.
Are You a Trans Oriented Man?
This is how I define myself, and how the transgender girls call us. But in a more simple way, I prefer to address myself just as a trans lover, which is somehow more easy to understand its meaning. Isn't it?
I know that labels are not so important for some of us ( or even hated ), but for better understanding to who is not so familiar with the LGBT lingo, I'll employ some whenever it is necessary.Anyway, I don't wanna bore you with these "technical" (?) things now, and I'll tell you something more about myself.
I guess, I'm the only man in my country who is taking this matter on a serious emotional stage. Here you can have a look at my firs Italian blog La Mia Fidanzata Transex, where I started in 2013. Later on, I decided to open a second website exclusively dedicated to Asian Ladyboys, since my girlfriend is a transsexual girl from the Philippines. Then I've created La Mia Ladyboy, always for Italian public.
2015 - The New Journey Into Transgender World
Just to make you understand even better how serious I'm taking it, in 2015, I decided to start reblogging (?) my old Italian content in English. Is not a mere remake of my old web sites, which are all about a love relationship with transsexuals women. If you went to see how my old blogs, you noticed they are pretty different.
Nevertheless, I recently published Ladyboy Travel Date. All about transgender dating in Asia, dedicated to ladyboy lovers, with tips on how to find an Asian ladyboy girlfriend. Besides, you'll find guides for your travels in Asia, best destinations, a bit of local LGBT scene, the difference between westerner culture and exotic east one. It is still in developing, but I hope you will like it 🙂 Same I did with the current one you are browsing now, My transsexual girlfriend.
I also collaborate with the other major websites always related to transsexual dating, transgender rights, LGBT community and so on.
Why am I doing this blog about transsexual dating?
To a more personal matter, because I am aware of how many men out there has been trough what I'm going to tell you now, and more than that...
During my teenage, I started to notice my "particular" (?) attraction ( or diversity for who want to see it that way ). I didn't know yet how to face and accept it, on the contrary, I was trying to reject it... - " What?! Am I gay? "- One thing is sure... I never felt any physical attraction, neither feelings for a man, but when I was seeing transsexual girls... It was a different feeling, the same strong attraction I feel for women, excitement and curiosity.
Though, all these emotions were sending me in tremendous paranoia, " What?!? Me gay?!? Are we joking? ", " I like sexy female bodies, boobs and curves, what's this story? ". After all, my mind was only blind; I was an ignorant, or maybe just a victim? I'll get there now.
Desperation, depression, rivers of questions and internal conflicts, I felt myself for a long time a victim of the social culture and reality we are living. Terrified of what people could have said or thought about me... But I overcame all of this. Today am not afraid anymore of other's opinion and the stares of ignorant people.
Unfortunately, though, not all young and even mature men are ready to accept and face it. Why? For example, If you add the homophobia and transphobia, that are still a problem and a long battle to win, I can't blame them sometimes. Because of this awareness, I decided to write this blog now. I know there are people like me out there who are going through these situations. Probably stacked in a limbo, depressed and unhappy. Then, I hope my stories can help you out somehow, both you young guys and mature men, and maybe even transexual girls as well.
The web is handy
The Internet if used in the right way, can help you out to open your eyes as it did for me. How?
My path to recognize and understand my sexual orientation, for many aspects, has been a bit different compared to some friends of mine. Guys who are trans-oriented like me ( just like those in the pic, I will present you them in future articles on my blog ).
By one side, what had helped me to understand better myself, beyond direct experiences in real life, surprisingly has been the internet web in the last decades. If you are living in a small town as I was, where the chance to meet people like you is limited, or simply someone you were dreaming on, the internet can be a turning point if used in the right way.
The new opportunities arrived with the globalization, invited me to look elsewhere. I got to know many new people from other countries, discovering different realities that I didn't even know could exist. And others that I knew a few.
Beyond the borders and awareness
That has permitted me to liberate myself from many frustrations and to discover that is even possible to live a peaceful relationship with a transsexual woman. For example, that exist countries in Asia like Thailand and Philippines, where LGBT people are better recognized and respected in the society, and much more else. Today I consider some of these countries like a " promised land " although I love my country ( the Italy ), my family and friends. But I often have the sensation of " the fish out of water " if you get what I mean... By the time I have decided to move in Asia, the land of my transsexual girlfriend, whose a Filipina ladyboy.
Just like my friends who are trans lovers, I had more experiences with transsex women than genetic girls. Of course, I'm attracted to femininity, sexy curves and feminine grace, but the perfect partner for me is, and will always be, the transsexual woman. I'm not changed since I accepted myself, I'm always the same person I once was, I've just learned to don't mind what other people say and accept my sexual orientation. Do you want to know how I did it? Keep reading on then...
Do you think that I'm gay then?
Naturally not, I don't feel anything for masculinity, and I do not feel attracted to men at all (you will find a dedicated article about this matter on my blog soon). You shouldn't consider yourself gay as well. I love transsexuals women as for their femininity, and because they often happened to be more sexy and feminine than many genetic girls ( GG ) out there. You shouldn't consider yourself gay, and should treat your ts girlfriend as a woman!
I'm currently in a happy long-term relationship with my transsexual Filipina girlfriend, and these blogs are dedicated to her, us, and all the men who love transgender women like me.
The depression is only an ugly memory
For years I was feeling attracted to these special girls, inside myself, I always knew they were the right partner for me. The problem was, accepting myself and my sexual orientation wasn't that simple. Because of taboo in the society we are living, I surrendered the idea to stay single for the rest of my life, without a true companion... Because of the conditioning and social stigma of the western society, discriminations towards LGBT people ( lesbian, gay, bi-sex, trans ), although the attraction for transsexuals, in reality, is mainly straight. I dated transsexual girls for a long time, though I hadn't the courage to do coming out yet, and my attraction was just a secret... until one day...
The Philippines, Manila, Andrea, and new friends
A day of some years ago, such for a case, I met Simon on Internet, a French guy. We began an interesting exchange of opinions and stories about our romanced love relationship with these extraordinary girls and our dreams for the future. That was for me a turning point. After some time spent to chat with him, I felt like being born again at a new life, full of new hopes. I was not alone. At that point, he had already published his stories on the internet and wrote many interesting and precious information s, that inspired me to do the same.
Coming out as trans lover
That's how I managed to do the so-called " coming out as trans lover", seeing I was not alone... Was there somebody around just like me. Another man who wanted more than a mere one night stand, that was dreaming a lifetime partner and a happy, genuine love relationship. Like every couple does, with a person, I feel naturally attracted, a t-girl.
As I told, I always knew that having a real love relationship with a transsexual girl was the right thing for me. What would make me truly happy, but first I needed to get out from the shadow and began to don't mind of public opinion to be able fully living in serenity. So, I finally did come out as trans lover. And I've never been so happy in my life than before. My current girl is the woman I always dreamed, cute, sweet, and funny to be with, so passable that hardly somebody could tell she is not a genetic woman.
Trans women are victims of so many wrong stereotypes and preconceived. I do know there are so many men out there who would love having a special girlfriend. But for the reasons I mentioned till here, and lacking knowledge, this makes them do false steps or acting wrong.
That's another of the reasons why I decided to share my stories about my love relationships. Then I hope it could help you to do the same, and possibly also help t-girls as well, so don't surrender the research of a good, sincere man. Who will love and accept them for who they are.
It makes me truly happy doing all of this. Because I believe, like my friends, that helping people like us to find happiness will also benefit the recognising of transgender women rights.
And you? Are you attracted to transexual women like me? Are you ready to do you coming out as trans lover? I would like to hear your story!
Let's keep in touch?
This is a little resume of my story, and you will find out more on my blog. I'm always happy to receive your emails, and read your stories, answering your questions it's always a pleasure. Don't hesitate to ask me anything; I'll reply you back as soon as I can. Want to keep in touch? Join my newsletter and I'll keep you up to date with next articles and some exclusive content I'm writing for my subscribers.
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